When Opportunity Knocks

“When opportunity knocks, don’t let fear hold you back. Open the door and embrace the opportunity that has come forth.”

I have to admit that I often struggled with opportunities because of my preoccupation with getting it “right.” In that struggle, I have experienced many missed opportunities whether small or big, personal or professional. I was raised with the notion that things needed to be right, perfect, or done a certain way all the time. For example, there was no way a visitor would come into my mother’s home and it not be well put together. If you were a close relative that dropped by unannounced, even if our home did not look immaculate, the hospitality was served to perfection. You couldn’t leave until you were full of delicious Haitian food. My mother waited on you hand and foot and I was her little helper. My father was the resident comedian and storyteller and my brother was often the subject of at least one story or joke. There was absolutely no restaurant you could have gone to that could compete with this service. My mother had a cousin that benefited the most from this red carpet treatment. Even though he knew my parents had rigid religious beliefs and would probably criticize him about his locs and pierced ears, he continued to drop by our house every now and then. This cousin had some resemblance to Wyclef. He was so cool and down to earth. He did not come with money like some older relatives, but I still loved his company and I think he knew my family did too. He knew that my parents would get past their hangs up about his appearance and just see him and enjoy him. Our cousin did not allow such small hurdles to overshadow the more significant opportunity: the best home-cooked meal in town and quality time with family. However, he also gave us the opportunity not just to serve, but to connect. My mother served with joy because she knew there was value in this relationship and this was the best reward she could offer. The lessons I learned about opportunity through these exchanges are vastly different as an adult than when I was a child. At a young age, I focused more on what my mother did and I modeled after her behavior. I often got caught up in preparing for hurdles because the possible repercussions were anxiety-provoking. Presentation was important. Falling apart was not an option. Reciprocation was a necessity and so was being fully prepared to seize (very select and specific) opportunities. I have gained a better understanding as I have matured and now realize that my take on opportunities was so limited. It is rewarding to be open to the unexpected. In the past, I had done a lot of unnecessary running around (being anxious, being frustrated) when sometimes what I needed to get over hurdles or to take advantage of opportunities were already somewhere along the journey. All I had to do was just be. Sometimes I didn’t need anything at all. I, little old me, was already the perfect presentation necessary for the opportunity. Likewise, my mother did not need to break out the fine china, she could have served the meal on paper plates. (Of course, it wouldn't be as pretty.) She did not need to go make extra hors d’oeuvres or a signature dish, she could have served whatever she had. She could’ve just been there and it would have been enough. The opportunity here was quality time and I am learning not to miss out on the important things in life by being busy. Our cousin also taught me that sometimes you can’t wait for opportunity to knock on your door, you have to knock on opportunity’s door. Yes, there may be some challenges along the way that you may or may not be able to prepare for, but embracing fear will only keep you back from what is on the other side. The reward may be far greater, but you will never know until you knock on that door. What if missing opportunities are much riskier than just embracing opportunities in whatever way it comes forth?